When we first arrived it was immediately clear who was available on Wednesday afternoons. The group was comprised of five women, three well into their silver years, Joannie, Louise and Carol, one tired and disillusioned fifty something housewife, Margaret, and an 84 year old grandmother, Betty, who was alert but tiny and frail. Her daughter had dropped her off and quickly retreated to a nearby coffee shop for the duration of the lesson. As a group, we waited in the corner of the dance studio for the private lesson ahead of us to finish. A young couple was rehearsing a romantic wedding dance so as to impress their guests. It was clearly the bride's idea. She wanted to give her day that extra special detail. The groom was uncomfortable, especially when he saw me. Generally guys don't want other guys to know they take dance lessons. Either you have it or you don't. It’s not a pursuit you actually put effort towards, or at least not publicly. Most guys are more than happy to admit "I can't dance!"
As they glided across the polished wood floor, our class swooned. The couple were not quite effortless yet, but they were definitely in sync and we could tell they had made wonderful progress. After some final pointers, the couple disappeared from the floor and Richard their instructor, approached us. He was a heavier set middle-aged man with a perfect posture and a deceptively easy step. He flashed a broad smile and immediately joked at our uneasiness. "You all look like you have been sent to the principal's office." He spoke with a slight British accent, not the kind that is authoritative, rather the one that’s your best mate. He immediately answered the group's need for gossip and detail. "That couple, Kelly and Kevin, have had private lessons for six weeks. Their wedding is in the summer."
"Oh they are wonderful!"
"How lovely!"
"Beautiful!"
"Magical!"
It was a chorus of awe and praise.
Kelly and Kevin? I thought. Even their names had been matched. The wedding was too planned for the marriage to last. My anxiety fueled my disdain. Sarah was absolutely smitten. I could see her eyes wide with wonder.
"Don't worry," Richard spoke directly to me. "we’ll be starting right from the beginning this afternoon. No previous experience necessary!"
Everyone smiled and let out an audible sigh of relief. I was still suspicious though. This all felt like a trap.
"I would like to begin by welcoming and congratulating our winning couple, Julian and Sarah. They won our door prize at the recent McDougal House gala."
"Oooh." The older women were delighted at our good fortune and applauded respectfully. As a shiny young university couple, we immediately became the darlings.
"Now, we usually don’t get many gentlemen in our classes, especially during the daytime. Julian would mind helping us out a bit as a lead? And Sarah would you mind sharing?" Richard asked the two questions simultaneously though he directed his request more towards Sarah.
Sarah helpfully replied "No, not at all!"
"Fantastic!" Richard was pleased and the whole class murmured with excitement.
How wonderful! I had just been pimped out as a gentleman host. I quickly attempted to lower everyone's expectations. "I’ve never danced before."
Richard smiled at me. "I know exactly what you’re feeling. You’ll do fine." He nodded his head using the masculine code: relax no one is watching. "We’ll start with a basic foxtrot."
We lined up in two rows facing each other, ladies on one side and "leads" on the other. I had been emasculated to make the other volunteer lead, Louise, feel more comfortable. Women are not so visceral about gender roles at least when it comes to dancing. They are more interested in the experience than the perception. I, on the other hand, could feel my brethren, all of mankind, watching my every move...
Excerpt from Oblivion
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